Taking Kids out of the Comfort Zone

One of the best things you can do for your child's development is to take them out of their comfort zone!, regularly.
Children that are given that opportunity are very rarely bored or irritable and tend to develop a positive "hands on or lets get moving" approach as they grow. They also cope a lot better when hiccups occur and have better observation skills.

Routine tends to set people in their ways. Strict routine makes attitudes very stale and uncompromising.

Today's "Out of the Comfort Zone" topic is Transport

There are so many ways to get people from A to B, yet when a regularly set mode of transport can't be used, most people come undone and life seems to stop.

I knew a high school student whose mum dropped him off at school each morning on the her way to work. One day the car didn't start, they staid home for the next 3 days while the car was being fixed. It was only a 3 block walk to school, less than 15 minutes. It never occurred to him or his mother that he could walk the short distance and she could catch the train. The only mode of transport for them was the car, it had become so ingrained into their mindset that other forms of transport such as walking, cycling, train, bus, or organizing a lift, had never even been considered. Sadly, they had become crippled by their routine.

If you normally drive to the shops and find yourself parking in the same area, change it. If you need to drive, ask the kids (depending on the age) "Where shall we park today, I feel like somewhere different?" Allow them to make a suggestion. If their eye's pop open and point to some direction, that's great, you have engagement. Getting out of the car, give them the responsibility of that suggestion: "Do you think you remember where we parked, lets look around...." Returning to the car park after shopping, ask your child if they remember where the car is. They will, praise them for such a great memory.

Leg Power!!
Walking is fantastic, soothes the soul and you can delight in little discoveries that normally wouldn't be found if you were driving along

Get your child to lead the way, allow them to decide which way to go. If they decide in the opposite direction, let them know they have chosen the wrong direction. Get them to think about it if they protest, about the way when traveling in the car. Get them to look for landmarks if possible.
Encourage them to change the route each time, "We went that way last time, let's see where this way will take us".
After all possible routes are exhausted, they might have found a favourite way, or the quick way etc, then the choices are still there.
Also inform them too that there might other factors when deciding a route, such as time. "Today we have to take the quick way as we don't have a lot of time, or it looks like it might rain quite soon" etc.
If time is short, suggest cycling. If the weather is not favourable, how about taking the bus or train.

Introduce Public Transport ASAP
Using the bus or train introduces the idea of coordinated, communal traveling and strangers. There are also a lot of processes involved with using public transport, such as buying tickets, which train/bus, which platform/bus stop, timing of the trip etc. It's an incredibly valuable education in engagement and decision making.

I am aghast at the amount of teenagers or young adults who are fearful of using trains or buses because of so many factors that include the following
1) There so many strangers,
2) I don't know which train to take
3) What ticket to buy
4) What do I do if I get off at the wrong station.

Some years ago my daughter Zjarie and her best friend Rachel organised with a few friends to venture into the city to see the annual Archibald Prize at the Art Gallery Of NSW. At the age of 15, she was a public transport pro!.
Middle of the day, Saturday, lots of people and safety in numbers, they were at an age that parental supervision should now be limited.
A group of ten 15 year olds wanted to go. There was some coordinating to do. The train seemed to be the best option as St James Station was just a very short walk to the gallery. As we live in a rural area and most of the kids were scattered over a 20 km distance, quite a few didn't live any where near the 3 stations available. The question was posed if 3 or 4 could sleep overnight beforehand, some also needed to be back before a certain time due to other commitments. All were to meet at the designated train station for the 9.05am train and be back by 3.30pm.

Listening to the girls discuss everything from timing, billeting and itinerary with expertise was amazing and reassuring, these girls had everything under control without parental supervision. There were a couple of hiccups. One boy who had just achieved his black belt in karate wasn't confident enough to go on this daytime excursion without a parent. He had never used public transport before and traveling all the way into the city was to much for him so he bailed out. The other hiccup was a parent who rang me, I had to hold the phone at arm's length, her expletives still made my ears curl. There was another forced bail out.
The day came and went, it was the first of many, many such trips. 8 teenagers would have fond memories of a fantastic day in the city complete with culture and a picnic lunch in the park, the same 8, who get together, travel the country and this year will go to Greece during University break.

The moral of this story is; At one point in time you can no longer hold your childs hand, you have to let go. Introducing & educating them in life's skills from the earliest possible time will make the transition for you and your growing child all the more easier.