My ex husband along with our girl chose a restaurant in Sydney's Leichhardt suburb, called Tuscany. Usually a tad over an hour from home, it took us more than 2 hours in a gridlocked road called a freeway accompanied by torrential rain.
Before we left, Zip was running late with the demands of being dressed to the nine's in a stunning, yet daring outfit and all things a young beautiful girl needs to do to look even more beautiful. Then again it's her night and it's her birthday.
The 'boys', her older brothers, came online before we left to talk while I was braiding a squirming Little Miss Mischief hair. Simultaneously, one hand typing, one hand braiding, feet were trying unaided to slip into a tight pair of slingback shoes under the desk, I had it all under control.
Ritch emerges from his bedroom, having prized himself begrudgingly from his computer to actually get dressed, asks if he looks alright. Scanning his flannette shirt and daggy shorts, I tell him "upmarket darling, scale it up a bit". Scratching his forehead with a 'do I have to' look he comes back a second later, having changed only his shorts.
Men don't like getting dressed do they?
Finally on route, the car pelted by bullets of heavy rain, I'm glad they chose inside seating. It isn't very long at all when Little Miss Mischief asks "Are we there yet?". Sigh, insinc we all say "NO!"
For 2 hours, the family is sardined in Milly, my car. For 2 hours I hear Zip scoffing at Ritch's attire, both of then in turn, snapping at Little Miss Mischief wedged in the middle of the two, bouncing around more than a cat on a hot tin roof, the ting of constant text messages, the ring of phones and a radio not offering any sort of music that any of us enjoy at all.
At one point all of us bar Little Miss Mischief are talking on the phone, she's not happy with that, "Why don't I have a phone too?" she sooks. Ritch and Zip argue with her that she's only 7 and doesn't need one, she promptly returns a list of classmates that have mobiles. It seems every child in her class has one except her.
Milly begins to fog up, there's a little too much heat in the car.
Maurie, behind the wheel answers his phone (its' OK we are not moving at all) from a business partner, I answer a call from a friend, Sarah, who is in Port Douglass on a family sabbatical of road tripping around Australia. I am following Sarah's blog about up rooting her family from their luxury home and lifestyle in exchange to a life on the road with Vera, their camper van. All is not going too well for the newly aspired family of gypsies.
We finally arrive to a town that's come to life, people are everywhere. This is the part of city life that I miss, the hub, the hive of people living and entertaining, of being out there. A miracle happens; we find parking immediately and the 2 hour frustrated commute is just as quickly forgotten.
For a white linen napkin restaurant, unexpectedly Ritch blends in completely with the other patrons, Zips way over dressed, but serves to be delectable eye candy for most of the men in the restaurant. Mum, dad, step dad and step mum are so proud of our girl that I can feel a Stevie Wonder song coming on "Isn't she pretty, isn't she wonderful....."
The restaurant fronts the famous Norton Street, though open to the elements from the front we are protected from the rain by the large canopy. Across the road was once the SoHo gallery were I had an exhibition some years ago, it's now an all night book store. Many buses drive through the famous street, all the drivers are dressed in Santa suits, bellowing out reverie from their window, little Miss Mischief is excited about all the Santa's, racing out onto the sidewalk to greet them back. There are many groups of people from hen's parties, bucks parties and a few obvious birthday parties. The atmosphere is alive and electric.
The food is divine and the company even better. The one grandparent left, Nan Betty is there, not long flown in from England. For Betty, my ex mother in law, seated next to her new daughter inlaw, she is glowing from her new lifestyle of jet setting widowdom. Most of my ex husband's family are now scattered across Australia and the globe, Betty has many places to visit when the whim arises. For Zip & Ritch there are Aunts, Uncles and cousins, plus a step sister on the very long table, there are plenty of people to talk to. Little Miss Mischief dances around all of them, asking if they are her cousins too.
Technically she doesn't belong to my ex husband's family as she is mine & Maurie's daughter but she is warmly welcomed by them all.
I'm glad that both my ex husband and myself 'buried the hatchett' years ago, because if we hadn't, then this fun night of celebrating together would not have been possible.
To my beautiful, darling, gorgeous daughter, Zjarie my 'right hand man' for most of her lifeHappy 21st Birthday Sweetpea!
May the road rise up to meet you.
May the sun always shine where ever you are.
May luck walk with you every step of your life.
May life present you an answer whenever you come to a fork in the road.
May providence smile when you smile.
May the Midas Touch always be at your fingertips.
May your beauty last longer than naturally fair.
May love warm your heart and cool your woes.
May your life be an uplifting roller coaster ride
May the sunset and each morning sun be as beautiful as you are in your long life
May love and happiness live in your life as much as I love you.
In future years both my ex husband along with our new spouses and myself will need to get together for occasions our children will put us through, such as wedding's, birth of grandchildren (fingers crossed) birthdays etc. For many people that have divorced parents, events like these are an emotional nightmare, often resorting to double celebrations or even secrecy.
A friend of Zip just recently engaged is going through this type of nightmare. The whole joy of their happiness is being marred by warring parents. After a couple of weeks of heated phone calls, the bride to be on the verge of a total emotional breakdown, the groom to be called all the parents (both sides are divorced) and laid down the law
"We want the people that we love and matter the most in our lives to celebrate this wonderful time. Stop being so incredibly selfish, self centered and cruel. Come to our engagement party as proud loving parents, but your issues are definitely not invited, not wanted, they are the partners you can keep at home".
Well the phone went quiet he said, the official engagement party is next month, lets hope his young, wise words of wisdom work.
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